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Re: Topical limerics.

Posted: Tue Jul 25, 2017 11:49 pm
by bindeweede
Fox not Trusted with Chicken



The EU gave Liam a kickin

About chlorination of chicken

Which Brussels forbids

But Fox reckons kids

Will find chlorine sauce finger-lickin.


:fp

Re: Topical limerics.

Posted: Tue Aug 01, 2017 11:04 pm
by bindeweede
The longest word anyone knows is

A monster I sadly suppose is

One nobody can

Conceivably scan

Pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanokoniosis.


Yep. Twitmericks again.

Re: Topical limerics.

Posted: Mon Aug 21, 2017 5:53 pm
by bindeweede
Hunt Sabotaged

A learned professor named Hawking

Provoked ministerial squawking

From Jeremy Hunt,

Creating affront

By showing what crap he’s been talking.

Re: Topical limerics.

Posted: Thu Oct 26, 2017 5:24 pm
by bindeweede
Ain’t That a Shame


Farewell to an artist whose name

Is in rock n roll’s hall of fame

Who once found a thrill

On Blueberry Hill

Fats Domino: Ain’t That a Shame.

Re: Topical limerics.

Posted: Sun Nov 12, 2017 6:05 pm
by bindeweede
A chap from Korea named Kim

Called Donald decrepit and dim

Said Trump in retort:

“He’s fat and he’s short

But I’m never rude about him!”

Re: Topical limerics.

Posted: Thu Dec 07, 2017 10:17 pm
by bindeweede
It's a couple of days old, but there does not seem to have been too much change.

As Britain negotiates Brexit,
The border continues to vexit.
With May’s coalition
In fragile condition
This could be the issue that fexit.

Re: Topical limerics.

Posted: Fri Jan 12, 2018 9:03 pm
by bindeweede
United States President Trump,

Whose words are produced from his rump,

Was rude about Haitians

And African nations

And branded south London a dump.

Re: Topical limerics.

Posted: Mon Jan 15, 2018 1:19 pm
by Croydon13013
bindeweede wrote:
Fri Jan 12, 2018 9:03 pm
And branded south London a dump.
The step too far!

Re: Topical limerics.

Posted: Mon Jan 15, 2018 1:38 pm
by Matt
I liked the response: "Haitians don't want an apology, just a lock of his hair"

Re: Topical limerics.

Posted: Wed Jan 17, 2018 2:58 pm
by polomint38
bindeweede wrote:
Fri Jan 12, 2018 9:03 pm
And branded south London a dump.[/b]
South West London is the dump not South East London, which is spectacular :ey

Re: Topical limerics.

Posted: Sun Jan 28, 2018 4:04 pm
by bindeweede
Where once people fought for their bread,
They riot for hazelnut spread;
Marie Antoinette
Might well declare: “Let..
Them eat peanut butter instead”.


https://www.theguardian.com/world/2018/ ... ed-nutella

Re: Topical limerics.

Posted: Sun Feb 18, 2018 9:36 am
by bindeweede
We know 13 Russians played roles
In hacking American polls
To badmouth and pillory
Candidate Hillary,
But who was controlling the trolls?

Re: Topical limerics.

Posted: Tue Mar 13, 2018 8:41 pm
by bindeweede
The reason why Donald sacked Rex
Is probably not that complex.
He had an idea
About North Korea
Which none of his staffers respex.

Re: Topical limerics.

Posted: Fri Apr 13, 2018 3:36 pm
by bindeweede
Some cops lost a big stash of pot

Then argued that mice ate the lot.

The judge said ‘So why

Are said mice not high?

You may be on drugs but I’m not!’

Re: Topical limerics.

Posted: Thu Apr 26, 2018 8:56 pm
by bindeweede
The Tory MP Amber Rudd
Whose name is increasingly mudd
Protects Mrs May
But day after day
Her statements turn out to be crudd.